Are people so desperate...
...to form a connection with someone, that they will instantly disclose personal information to a total stranger online? The answer is yes! In my brief experience online, I've found males in particular to be overly anxious to "become friends" with female characters. It starts out simply enough, playing in a pick up team together, chatting in group, sending tells, typical shit. Except for the desire to know...are you really a female? Where do you live? How old are you? Are you single? Now here's the thing, I like to flirt and anyone who knows me is aware of this fact. But I don't want to be creeped out by guys while ingame. I play so that I can have fun, see my friends (sort of atleast by way of their toons) just do something mindless for a little while. Not be practically stalked. :D That might be a little much, but it is agitating.
Let me tell you about two guys in particular.
Scary boy #1
One I met and had teamed up with several times in the span of about week. I made the decision to add him to my global friends list...against the advice of my Fine Feathered Friend. Almost instantly I started to get a tell from him as soon as I logged on. Every time I logged on. So I figured what the hell, I did make the choice to add him so, I'll get to know him a little better. He's 19, living in Florida and is a bisexual male. That's simple enough, except for the fact that he asked me to go to his site and read up on him, his interests and whatnot. In doing this, I decided that I didn't want to spend any more time "getting to know him". On the site he has a list of his interests, which include and aren't limited to...blood, blades, pain, death, anger, hate, night, bleeding, cutting, suicide etc. Let me state that it wasn't just this that did it. Although it was enough, he started to say after a few days that we were perfect for eachother and that I should move in with him. Sure, it could have been a joke. But he said that I was his soul mate, that he was so happy that we met because he really needed to be with someone like me, that if I would just move in with him and love him that he would try to stop drinking and smoking...just for me. This was it, I was so not talking to this boy anymore. He still sends me tells every time I log on asking why I removed him from my global friends list. And yes I did tell him that I was going to do so. Needless to say that I no longer add anyone to my global list, and that I am extremely cautious as to what I let people know about me. Scary boy #1.
Scary boy #2
This guy I met yesterday. Since no one I knew was on I decided that I would just run around saving people. Also I was talking to ZaZa. So I spent half the time just standing around ingame. While doing so I received a tell saying, "Hello thick tighs". I wasn't too sure how to react to this, and since I am generally not one to ignore a tell I said, "Hi". :) I thought that that would be it, but it wasn't. He started to say that he liked my thick ass because he likes his women to have a little meat on their behinds. Then he asked if I was really a guy or a girl...I said girl. I thought that that was harmless enough, but I'll say that I'm a guy next time. Then he asked if I was single and how old I was. I said that I was indeed single, but that I was 15. lol He said, " Figures" then ran off. I thought that this was incredibly rude, so I sent him a tell asking if he had left because of my age, and if so that it was rude of him to do so. He came running back from where ever it was that he had gone and asked if I was really 15. I said no then asked how old he was. Over 20 was the response that I got....and under 35. After this incredibly odd and breif exchange he then sent me an invite to be global friends. I declined, having learned my lesson with Scary boy #1. He got annoyed by this and started to ask why I wouldn't accept his invite. I explained and he then said, "Well if you only have friends on your friends list, lets become friends". Yeah like that can happen in 5 minutes. Well atleast not with anyone who isn't Grinningcomb. :) *hugs* Throughout the rest of the night he sent me random tells asking what I really looked like, where I lived, if I was "good at the pushin" (exact words). I finally got so fed up with his shit, that I asked him to stop and that if he didn't I would report him. He did for a bit then decided to tell me that he was logging off and that he would look me up again when I wasn't on my rag. Scary guy #2
*Number one line that I hate to get..."It's ok, you can trust me I'm not a stalker." That line in itself just puts me on edge. And yes, both SG#1 and SG#2 said this to me.
My question is then to all the guys I know, why do men think that if they are pushy with their advances that a girl will some how be turned on and want to be with them? I mean, SG#1 is still creeping me out. He thinks that I'll move in with him and save him from himself. SG#2 is just a creep.
So to the guys in my life, thank you for disproving the myth that "all men are dogs". I've been fortunate to have you all in my life. You've managed to give me faith that finding a good man is possible. You've helped raise my standards from crap to just fucking amazing. :D I love each and everyone of you!
Let me tell you about two guys in particular.
Scary boy #1
One I met and had teamed up with several times in the span of about week. I made the decision to add him to my global friends list...against the advice of my Fine Feathered Friend. Almost instantly I started to get a tell from him as soon as I logged on. Every time I logged on. So I figured what the hell, I did make the choice to add him so, I'll get to know him a little better. He's 19, living in Florida and is a bisexual male. That's simple enough, except for the fact that he asked me to go to his site and read up on him, his interests and whatnot. In doing this, I decided that I didn't want to spend any more time "getting to know him". On the site he has a list of his interests, which include and aren't limited to...blood, blades, pain, death, anger, hate, night, bleeding, cutting, suicide etc. Let me state that it wasn't just this that did it. Although it was enough, he started to say after a few days that we were perfect for eachother and that I should move in with him. Sure, it could have been a joke. But he said that I was his soul mate, that he was so happy that we met because he really needed to be with someone like me, that if I would just move in with him and love him that he would try to stop drinking and smoking...just for me. This was it, I was so not talking to this boy anymore. He still sends me tells every time I log on asking why I removed him from my global friends list. And yes I did tell him that I was going to do so. Needless to say that I no longer add anyone to my global list, and that I am extremely cautious as to what I let people know about me. Scary boy #1.
Scary boy #2
This guy I met yesterday. Since no one I knew was on I decided that I would just run around saving people. Also I was talking to ZaZa. So I spent half the time just standing around ingame. While doing so I received a tell saying, "Hello thick tighs". I wasn't too sure how to react to this, and since I am generally not one to ignore a tell I said, "Hi". :) I thought that that would be it, but it wasn't. He started to say that he liked my thick ass because he likes his women to have a little meat on their behinds. Then he asked if I was really a guy or a girl...I said girl. I thought that that was harmless enough, but I'll say that I'm a guy next time. Then he asked if I was single and how old I was. I said that I was indeed single, but that I was 15. lol He said, " Figures" then ran off. I thought that this was incredibly rude, so I sent him a tell asking if he had left because of my age, and if so that it was rude of him to do so. He came running back from where ever it was that he had gone and asked if I was really 15. I said no then asked how old he was. Over 20 was the response that I got....and under 35. After this incredibly odd and breif exchange he then sent me an invite to be global friends. I declined, having learned my lesson with Scary boy #1. He got annoyed by this and started to ask why I wouldn't accept his invite. I explained and he then said, "Well if you only have friends on your friends list, lets become friends". Yeah like that can happen in 5 minutes. Well atleast not with anyone who isn't Grinningcomb. :) *hugs* Throughout the rest of the night he sent me random tells asking what I really looked like, where I lived, if I was "good at the pushin" (exact words). I finally got so fed up with his shit, that I asked him to stop and that if he didn't I would report him. He did for a bit then decided to tell me that he was logging off and that he would look me up again when I wasn't on my rag. Scary guy #2
*Number one line that I hate to get..."It's ok, you can trust me I'm not a stalker." That line in itself just puts me on edge. And yes, both SG#1 and SG#2 said this to me.
My question is then to all the guys I know, why do men think that if they are pushy with their advances that a girl will some how be turned on and want to be with them? I mean, SG#1 is still creeping me out. He thinks that I'll move in with him and save him from himself. SG#2 is just a creep.
So to the guys in my life, thank you for disproving the myth that "all men are dogs". I've been fortunate to have you all in my life. You've managed to give me faith that finding a good man is possible. You've helped raise my standards from crap to just fucking amazing. :D I love each and everyone of you!
posted by Neri at Friday, July 29, 2005
4 Comments:
:D Thanks. I guess I knew that already, but I have been laboring under the hope that it wasn't true. Oh well, hope remains. And yes, the particular toon that has caused so much of a riot amongst the male population is extremely scantily clad. So much so that I am occasionally distracted by her. :D
Just pretend you're a 15 year old guy. That really grosses them out, and all you really have to do to convince them of this is sprinkle in some "bro" and "dude" in the conversation.
And, it gets pretty damn funny :)heh, they get so grossed out thinking they got off to a guy...*snicker*
People are lonely. Look to the Bible in Genesis, it basically depicts birth.
First there was nothing. Then there was God. God made light and having made light saw that he was alone, with this new vision came the awareness of being alone. Then God made another so as not to be alone...
First you were in the womb, dark and comfortable. Then you came out into the world to discover yourself apart from the world, unique and singular. It was cold, you cried and then there was Mother...
Being alone doesn't demand loneliness but we aren't really designed to stay that way indefinitely. Single, maybe, but alone?
I'm with Gehnen on this though. All the things that guys don't understand about girls the chatroom/MMO crowd understands even less well.
You're meeting all the same creepy guys you'd meet in the dark corners of a bar or whatnot but the Net is one big dark corner.
It's just a scarier place in the world of "online" anything than I thought it would be. I made the mistake of not listening to my F.F.F. and was as friendly/open with people that I met online as I would be with my own friends. I learned rather quickly that I could potentially put myself in a great deal of danger if I didn't start to treat these people for who they were, strangers. It's sad that even online you are forced to be guarded. To fear divulging too much information. It's hard to find that perfect balance of being nice and not naive. I'm working on it. :)
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